There’s something to be said for Clarity…

I feel the need to clarify things today since I’ve posted for a few days about different health issues that might be possible in connection with my current condition.

  1. I am NOT doing anything drastic, NOT making any abrupt changes
  2. I am NOT getting my hopes up about any information I’ve read or posted
  3. I am NOT in any better frame of mind about my health, so don’t get YOUR hopes up either .. in fact, if anything, I’m in a worse frame of mind because all of this only complicates things

Things I DON’T Know:

If I have ….

  • SIBO (Small Intestinal Bacterial Overgrowth)
  • Histamine Intolerance
  • Adrenal Fatigue
  • Hormone Dis-regulation
  • Mast Cell Disorder ….
  • and goodness knows what else

These are all just possibilities. As I’ve said, the symptoms of so many problems are all overlapping.

Thing I DO Know:

  • I need a doctor that will help clarify if I have other problems, provide additional diagnostic testing and stop lumping all of my symptoms under the EGE/EGID umbrella
  • I have Autoimmune Diseases – Hashimoto’s Thyroiditis and Eosinophilic Gastroenteritis
  • Treating Autoimmune Diseases is difficult and a lifelong challenge
  • There is likely an underlying root cause for all of this .. likely chronic stress which has other serious implications on one’s health that need to be addressed
  • I’m not a hypochondriac and I’m not just sitting here Googling symptoms to see what matches up – trust me, I’m sick and tired of researching and having to “doctor” myself
  • Left unchecked and untreated the other possible health problems that I could have can be very serious, and it ticks me off that doctors won’t look past a single diagnosis
  • It’s going to be a challenge to get my doctor to do tests to find out if I have any of the above
  • There is no one diet or treatment protocol that will “fix” me
  • There is no one person that’s going to take this on and know how to fix it – that’s clear. I need a team of healthcare practitioners who will work together .. good luck with that
  • I don’t point fingers at any one person who’s given me advice or blame any one of them progression or regression of current symptoms, nor will I discount anything they’ve said. To some degree or another, all of them have been right. It’s ridiculous and sad, but this is all a guessing game. I am a guinea pig.

Regarding Diet:

  • What am I going to be able to eat now?  I DO NOT KNOW!!!
  • I am NOT jumping from one diet to another … from AIP to SIBO, GAPS, Low FODMAP or any other diet for that matter. At this point – all of these diets are very specific and can create more problems if you’re utilizing them for something you don’t have. Dealing with diet having Hashimoto’s alone has it’s implications, but if I also have Adrenal Fatigue it just gets more complicated – I’m not the one to decide what’s next … but it’ll likely boil down to that … so ….
  • I need to have more tests run and there’s little doubt I’ll receive a lot of resistance from my GP about that. If she won’t do it I don’t know what the next step is … and around in guessing game circles we go!
  • I do not know what to eat for fear it causes stomach pain, worsens diarrhea, creates more skin problems or throws off nutrients or anything else for that matter.
  • I have no idea what to supplement with and what not to … it’s all dependent on what exact health issue you’re treating … and without solid results I won’t know.
  • In my case because this has come down to malnutrition and mal-absorption, to say to treat the gut first is ONE thing, but if I don’t supplement correctly at the same time it’s just a slippery slope

I’m tired of it all being a guessing game when there are tests that could rule things out. I’m tired of having to figure out what tests I need and what possible problems I might have .. which will most likely only going to get shot down.
I’m tired of trying to put this into someone’s hands that’s supposed to know what they’re doing … only to have it put back in my own.
I’m tired of dealing with new problems and symptoms every week or two.
I’m tired of trying to remain positive for my sake and everyone else’s
I’m tired … period.

I don’t want sympathy
I don’t want to deal with this
I don’t want to figure out whether to take on more work…or find a job
I don’t want to have to figure out what to do next
I don’t want to have to figure out what’s best

I want to bury my head in the sand
I want to run away from home
I want to be left alone

and no … that was NOT meant to sound like story by Dr. Seuss … but for some damn reason I can’t help but always come off as being “optimistic” and “having a good sense of humour despite it all”.

So … just to clarify … I’m not … and I don’t.

I’m sorry if this is all very depressing and I’m sorry if this comes off as being super grumpy, crabby, bitchy or otherwise … but this blog is here for me .. and that’s how I’m feeling … and I am giving myself permission to be grumpy, crabby and bitchy over this situation … because it stinks.

 

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